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So stuff..

I spoke with a school counselor today since I had time with my Asian Lit. class being canceled. It was helpful.. I dunno what will happen still, but I have some better ideas of my options I guess.

What I might end up doing is signing up to retake statistics for next semester as soon as registration opens up. After the end of the semester, I'll see what my final grades are and possibly retake any class that I don't get an A in. This should leave me with only one or two classes next semester, which would be a lighter load, although it also means no Pell grant (unless I decide to take on another drawing class or two for that.. we'll see). In any case, that should end up leaving me with a 4.0 GPA, since they'll be easier to take the second time around (and what with less brain fogging from gluten which was the problem with statistics the first time; math don't work when brain constantly dead).

I should have 37 credits by the end of this semester, which is enough to transfer to a state college, and with a 4.0 GPA and a membership in Phi Theta Kappa (which I have to check up on, since I haven't received anything yet), I should be able to get scholarships to help me with transferring. This means the possibility of being able to no longer work full-time in a poopy job that doesn't give me benefits. It means the possibility of attending state university free of charge (at least for a while), but we'll see. It means the possibility of living on campus or getting assistance with living near campus, which could help me out living wise. Even if I kept this job, UMCP is only about 15 minutes away, but I have every intention of using what resources I can to find a job that will pay me more and give me benefits. (I realized today that if it were possible to get a part-time administrative assistant job, I could be making the same amount of money by working half the hours).

Other options involve taking all simple classes next semester (IE, no more languages, probably all art classes) or taking a semester off if necessary. I'm looking forward to winter and summer breaks, at the very least, and having a simpler semester during spring if I take classes at all. I've just had way, way, way too much on my plate for far too long, I'm burned out, I have no time to rest or spend with friends, and I hate life. I don't like hating life. I hate life the way it is right now. I have been miserable every day for so long. It's time for some serious change, and school is a much, much lower priority than breathing, eating, sleeping, and not wanting to kill myself. I've been in serious need of therapy but I don't have the time or the money, and if I did, I might not need therapy..

I want to see people. I want to have the time to spend around people and to not be miserable while I'm with them as a result of my everyday life. I want life to be worth living not just some machine I'm a barely functional cog in.

There's also potential options like if mmsword gets a job down here and we can get a place together.. but we'll see. Lots of things to consider. I'll probably sign up for statistics regardless, and if I decide I don't want to take it, I'll be sure and drop it from the registry before spring semester starts..

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( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
sablemoonsilk
Nov. 15th, 2006 02:06 am (UTC)
mreeeewr. *hugs*

You have breathing space, in your classes and in your life. You've got wiggle room. Breath! And wiggle! Do a little shimmy-dance! :p
aekiy
Nov. 16th, 2006 02:51 am (UTC)
:hug: Mph.. I'm just going from 7:00 AM to 9:00 PM each day not including homework. Which I usually have to catch up on on the weekends..
At least I have a five day vacation coming up next week.. oof
sablemoonsilk
Nov. 16th, 2006 02:58 am (UTC)
Fourteen-hour autopilot? Ouch.

In high school I would always bring a binder or notebook with me, and every spare minute between classes, or in classes which bored me to tears, or waiting on the bus, I would do one math problem or write a little bit of a story or work on a doodle-page. I've been trying to work on characterization sheets for my NaNo in classes, but I can't - the classes are too interesting. I have started up another doddle-page, though, and will sit in the back of the lecture hall in Classical Mythology and listen to my professor and doodle the various Greek gods.
aekiy
Nov. 16th, 2006 03:50 am (UTC)
hehee.. you have got to doodle Athena and Nike as a couple, and also put Nike in a WNBA uniform.
Zeus needs to be drawn all Big Business-man like, standing in a penthouse suite in Seattle.
sablemoonsilk
Nov. 16th, 2006 02:23 pm (UTC)
I think I shall!
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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