Gorotsuki Tenshi (aekiy) wrote,
Gorotsuki Tenshi
aekiy

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Boundaries

Who can define the boundaries of love..? Mm...You know, I'd wanted to actually make an entry, tonight. Perhaps start using this journal regularly. I'm feeling so tired, now, though..

I have been thinking about that. I'm curious about this "love" thing, and how far it goes, what it means...How does one know what kind of love one feels? Usually, there is some indication...Some feeling there, to tell you what kind of love you feel for someone...But sometimes, it isn't so clear. A very dear friend of mine, one whom I have, and shall always, treasure...I cannot define my feelings for her. Sometimes, I want to think of her as a sister...But it isn't the same. It doesn't feel like that. At the same time it isn't merely a friendship, but also doesn't necessarily seem a romantic kind of love...It is just love, quite purely.

And, while I normally frustrate myself over not fully understanding something...This, this is different. It is that I love her, she loves me, and we both always shall treasure each other as the dearest of friends. There is a strange, but wondrous bond between us...I do not understand it, but I accept it quite fully, and need not worry about it's foundation being shook. It is pure...

Mm...'Tis an odd thing. I do love her enough, to do anything for her.. But, unlike in some situations, I have no troubles being a friend to her. I do not feel negative to consider that we may never have a romantic relationship, though I feel close enough to her for it. I don't know...I can just always imagine her in my arms, us holding each other, finding peace in one another...But not as lovers. I do not picture us kissing as lovers, or--heavens forbid--anything more. Fact is, I feel unclean even to note that I don't think such things. There is such a purity in her heart, in our bond. It is quite an incredible thing.

And at the same time, though I may question her, from a logical standpoint...Make sure she isn't simply acting on foolish desperation...I could not find myself turning her down, should she ever ask me..

Ah well...Solace is on its way. I move ever forward, sinking perhaps a bit here and there, but growing and learning and finding excitement about what's to come.

May the next find more answers...
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